I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
