i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
as a side note pls kill me
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Randomize
