So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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