bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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