aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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