At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
