this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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