wat bout pragnant strippers??
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
