They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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