this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
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