Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
The power of my boobs compel you
Randomize