This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
