So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Are these your boobs on my camera?
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
