Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
