at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I love having hate sex.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize