Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
