It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize