Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Randomize
