Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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