She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
