And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize
