Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
