i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Randomize
