forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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