Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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