I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
my phone needs a breathalizer
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
