At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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