i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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