We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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