You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
