i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
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