with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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