now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
