I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize