Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Ladies don't puke and tell
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
