Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
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