so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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