I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
