i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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