There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
