Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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