dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize
