whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
They are going to name an STD after you.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
