we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Randomize
