I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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