You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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