Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
