so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Terrible idea I love it
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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