We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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