Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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