After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
